ZarahereBy now everybody knows (In my Phaedra Parks voice) that I absolutely love being a Seasoned Woman!!! It really does feel good to love yourself, have confidence and know what and who you want in your life. One of the things I have learned from being seasoned is the way you carry yourself is important! Growing up my mother ALWAYS emphasized that as a woman you should carry yourself a certain way. As a child I never quite understood what that meant but now I understand completely.
The way you look, speak, treat other people makes up the way you carry yourself. I think the way we look is very important whether we want to admit it or not. It is not how other people should define us but our image is what gets us through the door whether its business or personal. And I am not talking about beauty. I am talking about class. Are you neat and clean? Are your clothes ironed and pockets tucked into your jeans (my pet peeve with my kids!)? Is your hair combed or out of place? Are your fingernails dirty? Do you smile or frown? All of these are things people see and make a determination as to whether they want to get to know you better.
Another thing which may be a touchy subject for the ladies is are you showing too much? I’m not talking about a little cleavage here or there or wearing a crop top. I’m talking about the barely there painted on dress. Don’t be shamed because I have done it but now I understand that leaving something to the imagination is way sexier than baring it all. Some celebrities and even influencers think it’s cute to show us everything they’re working with, but I am here to tell you it is not. Leave that for your man, woman or whoever you are dating in 2018. I’ll tell you another thing Sallie has said. If I can already see your whole city, state and country- why would I want to travel there anymore?
That was one of the main reasons I chose this dress as my Valentines look. I am almost completely covered but I am still SEXY (If I do say so myself). This dress is midi length which I love and has an open knit fabric which has a slip underneath but still shows just enough skin (size down for a more form fitting look cause the dress has a nice stretch). I don’t have to worry about tugging and pulling a dress down, scared I’m going to show all my mama blessed me with. I don’t have to think about a boob popping out or sliding up under my bra (Yes that has happened smh). I am still SEXY and SEASONED without giving everybody a peep show.
Don’t be scared, tell me how you really feel about women showing a lot of skin? Do you agree with what I said or think I’m too old school?
I pray you have an awesome Valentine’s Day whether you or boo’d up or single and satisfied. Remember to love yourself first because that’s how people will love you in return!
So I had planned another outfit for this post but last minute I had to pick something else. I couldn’t bring myself to wear much less promote anything from a company that obviously doesn’t want my coins and as a mother of a black son I’m just not here for it. So anyway I really had no idea what I wanted to wear and went to the mall for some inspiration. While browsing the clearance racks I found this gray duster and figured this would work with my favorite skinny jeans and a white shirt. But then it hit me! This outfit is so BASIC. No one will be excited about seeing these pics. I was on the verge of picking something else out, spending coins I shouldn’t when I said to myself this is a cute outfit. Why would I spend money I didn’t need to spend in order to impress anyone? I’m sorry that’s just not what a Seasoned Woman does. So instead I bought it and styled it (if you can even call it that) for the blog. I’m okay with being basic. And here are some reasons why:
Being Basic keeps my coins in my purse- When we try to impress people (people that don’t really care anyway) by being the flashiest or most extra, we are normally spending money we may not even have. Believe me ladies I know, I know. I’ve been the one with the designer bag and high heels trying to be the epitome of the Trina song we know so well. It didn’t do anything but leave me with no money to put in that purse and bad knees. As I’ve gotten more seasoned I’ve become okay with wearing basics. And this doesn’t just apply to clothes. It can happen when you try to be flashy and “front” as we used to say by being at every event knowing full well your gas light in your car is on or trying to keep up with Jones’ and having every cable channel, NBA league pass AND NFL ticket when no one humanly possible even has time to watch all that stuff much less pay for it! Hell I don’t even want cable anymore. I’ll Netflix, Hulu and Amazon Prime and chill any night. Or read a book (or listen to one).
Being Basic helps me stay in my own lane-A big part of being better (my word for 2018 -see the post here) is to focus on my strengths and improve upon my weaknesses and being basic helps me focus on that. When you’re not try to do all things and be everything and everywhere you learn to focus on what you love and what’s important. Suddenly losing so many loved ones last year helped me regain focus on truly living my life, discovering my passion and loving the ones I’m with.
Being Basic keeps me drama free-Nothing to see here cause I’m basic. When you give them nothing to talk about, there’s nothing to talk about. I’ll just stay over here making my moves in silence. Thanks.
Being Basic makes me unbothered- I don’t let too many things, people or situations bother me anymore. As a seasoned woman I have learned what is and what isn’t worth my time and energy. Sometimes that means being quiet, forgiving the offense and moving on to other things. I’ve also learned that worrying solves nothing and prayer solves everything. Saying just pray about it may be the most basic response someone can give when an issue arises but who can argue that prayer doesn’t work? I’ll wait.
Being Basic gets ish done- When you’re in your own lane, got a few dollars in that basic bag and you’re drama free and unbothered you get finish things. Honestly if I was trying to do the most, this blog post wouldn’t have gotten done. I think we all spend a little too much time on elaborate ideas instead of just executing simple plans, step by step. I always believe the mantra, progress is better than perfection. And who really wants to be fabulous but not moving forward in life. Not saying you shouldn’t present your best but just don’t get caught up that nothing is accomplished. Rather than trying to be the perfect most original blogger ever (in my opinion there is really no original idea only an original you!) I’ll just be basic and live my best life!
My closet is definitely something I am working on this year and this dress was a must have!
So probably by this date you are sick about hearing about goals and all that jazz so I won’t carry on or be long today. All I want to say is that you can write your goals down, pray over them, memorize and meditate over them whatever you do but none of that means anything if you don’t take action! Those same goals will be sitting in that pretty planner until next year and the year after that until you get up and start taking some steps even if they’re tiny ones. I think everyone wants to talk about the pretty side of goal setting but you have to know that nothing works until you do. And that may mean sacrificing time or money on other things or doing something toward your goal when you don’t feel like it (kind of how I felt today lol) but I say if you REALLY want something you’ll do whatever it takes. So go ahead and write that goal down (and subscribe to the blog so you can get your goal action plan download 😉 but make sure you put in the work too!!!
Now on to this dress hunny!!! This dress was definitely apart of my closet goals. To me closet goals is being able to go into my closet and wear whatever is there and look and feel good in it. No more never feeling like I have anything cute to wear! Am I the only one that feels like that? Anyways I absolutely love this dress except even though it fits everywhere else it is quite snug around my chest. Ugh!!! Fashion retailers if you’re listening you need to create sizing for us larger busted women. Okay rant over now let me tell you why this dress is amazing. First the pattern is classic and it’s a midi length shirt dress so it’s perfect for the office or church but I certainly think that you can dress it down for a brunch or happy hour (check out that split). And this Zara beauty is also goals because I can rock it with boots now but later in the spring some sandals and a colorful belt would look good too. You will definitely see me in this again just in a different way. Now tell me do you have closet goals too?
Don’t say New Year, New me. You’re already good just be better!
So normally around this time of year everyone is making their New Year resolutions. Well I’m not. I don’t think the beginning of a new year should be an indicator of change. First of all most people are scared of change but it is necessary in life. Without changes there would be no growth. Personally I have learned to embrace change. Without change I wouldn’t have this blog and have met so many wonderful women and men who have helped me grow and learn. So yeah change is scary but it definitely can also be good.
Another thing that a lot of people say this season is new year, new me. To me this is to say the old you isn’t good or something which is totally untrue. I think we are all good people (well most of us, our current world leader is questionable), some of us just get in bad situations, or make not so smart decisions or life just happens and our reactions aren’t well thought out or planned. But we are all still good. So instead of saying new year, new me, say new year, better me. Better decisions, better situations, and better reactions and planning. All that will lead to what I believe the Lord has put in all of us which is greatness! So in 2018, be GREAT!!
So this last minute NYE look is actually not last minute. I’ve had this dress since October from Forever21 (the plus line, it’s a 0x) and these shoes from JustFab for 3 yrs. I added the fur stole (it was on sale under $15) also from Forever21 and the sequined/ velvet clutch is from wait for it…the 99 cent only store! It doesn’t cost a lot to look poppin as the young folks say!!
I hope that you and your loved ones have a safe, happy and prosperous New Year. I will be sipping a little something something from the comfort of my own home for the free 99 but if you turn up make sure to do it responsibly and safely!!!
The color red exudes so many emotions. It is definitely a color that makes you feel powerful!
So I think I’ve mentioned before I used to hate the color red when I was younger. It is my mother’s favorite color and she CONSTANTLY dressed myself and my siblings up in it. She even bought us the ALL red Reebok high top shoes which I secretly despised. But what can you do when you’re 8 yrs old? So I had no choice but to go with it. I actually avoided wearing a lot of red during my teenage years and thru my twenties and early thirties. I am now embarrassed to say I completely understand why my mother loved the color red so much. Sorry Mama.
I guess I was too young or hadn’t been thru enough life experiences to completely understand the power that comes from this emotion provoking color. The color red is said to represent strength, power, passion, determination and love. It can even raise your blood pressure!!! (Per Colorwheel pro.com) No wonder this color is trending so much this season. Especially in women’s fashion when the current powers that be want to demean women and minimize our qualifications and capabilities. I love the color because it makes me feel empowered and sexy. Those are feelings I didn’t recognize or experience until I became “seasoned” thru life’s ups and downs. Now I wear this color with confidence! I hope you give the color red a try this season, not just because of how you may look in it, but how it makes you feel!
So everyone went wild for the Tracee Ellis Ross collection at JC Penney and I fully participated and ended up scoring the perfect dress to eat all you want at Thanksgiving!
So much like every other fashionista I know or just women in general who love Tracee Ellis Ross I was super excited when her clothing collection with JC Penney launched. Of course we all saw the previews and there was one particular dress I really wanted. It was a black and white striped midi dress but it quickly sold out online and I was unable to find my size in the store. My overall impression of the collection was that I liked it and I loved that it included plus sizes but everything wasn’t my cup of tea and that’s okay because I’ve already said in this post here Everything ain’t for Everybody.
Upon visiting the store however I did find this sweater dress but I will not lie I wasn’t too impressed. It looked huge and shapeless and I am no tiny woman so I felt I would appear big in it. Well hunny let me tell you! ALWAYS TRY CLOTHES ON!!! That goes for any size woman! You can never really tell if you will like something on the hanger so trust me on this and proceed to the nearest fitting room. I actually didn’t try this in the first time I saw it but a lovely lady on IG (@divinedivastyle) modeled it and I was like hmmm I might need to revisit that. So I went back to JC Penney and tried it on and I knew instantly this was the perfect dress for Thanksgiving! This is a sweater dress made with a really soft material (the cashier kept feeling on my dress y’all lol) and although it fits large the shape doesn’t make you feel huge. And since it’s not form fitting it is perfect to hide the food baby I will have once I eat my way thru EVERYTHING my mother in law prepares for our holiday meal! I got my dress in a L/XL and I probably could have went down in size but because I’m 5’7″ I needed the extra length the larger size provided. If the tattoo shows it may be a tad bit short lol! This dress was perfect to finally wear my Scarfed for Attention necklace I got for $5 from my favorite Paparazzi consultant Eve and my OTK boots from JustFab (hurry they are currently 50% off for Black Friday and selling out fast!)
So let me know in the comments if you would rock this dress or if you purchased anything from the collection!
I love fashion because it is mostly just recycling what we used to wear before! Right now trends from the 90s are hot and one trend I wanted to try was the ruffle sweater.
If you have looked lately tops and blouses these past few seasons have been all about adding feminine details whether it’s just a touch or boldly. I decided to just go with a touch but after styling this sweater I think I may be ready for the bold! Ruffle sweaters have been seen in all the online fashion sites and brick and mortar retailers. I took a gamble and picked this one up online from Forever 21 in a size large here. It was a gamble that paid off because I was afraid it would not be the best quality considering the price. I was also afraid I wouldn’t fit it properly due to my larger chest. I am happy to say the material is great, not thin but not too thick for Houston’s “fall” weather. And this is from Forever 21’s contemporary line which runs a little larger so it fit just right. I will say I have a long torso and I am y’all so it was ALMOST cropped so I made sure to wear my Fashion Nova high waisted jeans. Are you loving all the ruffles and bell sleeves being featured on blouses this season? Do you remember this trend from the 90s?
I am loving it!!! (well the updated version!)
And for all who have asked for details about my hair on my social media pages it’s a half wig which I purchased here. And here is a link for the video I followed to achieve this style. Thank you for the compliments! And if you would like to see a video or blog post about my wigs and why and how I wear them let me know in the comments below because I would be happy to make one1